It's you...

Dec 06

Bojack: Todd, I’m sorry alright I screwed up, I know I screwed up, I-I-

Todd: Oh great, of course, here it comes. You can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep doing shitty things and then feel bad about yourself like that makes it okay. You need to be better.

Bojack: I know, and I’m sorry okay, I was drunk and there was all this pressure with the Oscar campaign. But now, now that it’s over I-I

Todd: No. No, BoJack just stop. You are all the things that are wrong with you. It’s not the alcohol, or the drugs, or any of the shitty things that happened to you in your career, or when you were a kid. It’s you. Alright? It’s you. Fuck man, what else is there to say?

Bojack Horseman is unlike any other animated or cartoon(I can’t tell the damn difference) ever made. Almost every episode of Bojack is to some extent painfully relatable. Especially the above-mentioned episode from season 3 hits very hard, as here most of us can relate to Bojack.

Bojack Horseman is a narcissistic, stupid and always drown in the self-loathing guy that can almost never stay out of bad things but worst of all he knows all this, he knows what are bad but still does bad things and feels sad like Todd said, then how come he’s life is relatable to almost everyone? Because almost everyone is like this. We know where we suck, what we shouldn't do but we do them anyway and feel sad later like it makes it ok. The main problem that almost everyone is dealing with these days is sadness which again almost entirely is coming from never-ending self-loathing.

Self-loathing is by far the worst thing one can bury themselves in. As I've written in my previous story, people these days have gained almost everything but are failing miserably in achieving mental balance, the main issue I’ve experienced or seen is people having trouble in liking themselves.

Whenever there’s something we can’t achieve, we just go ballistic on ourselves that we’re useless and all or mostly we don’t even try to achieve something as we’ve established that we’re useless shit and there’s no point in trying. I want to clear out something here first, it’s not accepting responsibility if we’re just out there shitting ourselves like retarded douchebags. No, it’s a mental disease. We can’t do shit if we constantly undermine ourselves or worst hate ourselves or even worse blaming us for every trivial crap.

You’re a PRO!!

It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day — that’s the hard part. But it does get easier -BH

Always we should just keep that in mind, even though sometimes we know we’re just as useless as a bag of pebbles without a handle. Yes, I know it sounds stupid but that’s how we can survive. The world is a very bad place I’d say, especially now, I mean some horrible things are going on which are very hard to imagine and the only way we can survive is by establishing a support system to live on, which is you as we can’t always expect others to be with us.

If we constantly keep saying that we can’t do shit then we’ve already decided that we can’t, so we can just give up and die now than later watch ourselves fail another zillion times. The main thing to learn here is as Mr’s. Gump(Forrest’s mother) says God intended everyone to be the same, so we’re the same except we may find that some of us are more beautiful, talented, etc, etc… ok let them be and we can also be like them by working as hard as we can but consistently. This is another major thing to remember, even if we can learn or do something in fewer proportions we can become successful if we can manage to do that every day, every damn single day. Again the only way we get motivated to keep up every day is by deciding that we can do. No matter how shitty the odds are, remember that we can manage to find a way. Trust me we’ll find one.

Rock Botton isn’t an option

I’m mad (He mad), but I ain’t stressin’ -Kendrick Lamar

This is one of the theories my cousin told me recently. Let’s hear this small boring story.

“Ten days ago one night I’ve decided that I would make a web app where we can store small files and it would generate an encrypted URL with a password and all and I also wanted to learn how huge data gets handled with MongoDB. So, I’ve started reading about how to make that web app first but then decided that I’d learn entire cryptography that night and started Dan Boneh course which kicked my ass in between as I’ve tried to understand the derivations of formulae. I started reading calculus simultaneously and what not. Fast forward the time was 3:30 am in the morning and I was too deep in all that maths and half cryptography and a little MongoDB stuff too but hasn’t figured out shit. Drank 4 black coffee, spent literally the entire night till morning 5:30 and still hasn’t been able to do shit. Then I gave up and was extremely pissed at me for not able to learn anything and just shaved my face as I couldn't even look at my face in anger.”

I know it’s a boring story but what I’ve realized later was that I was too asinine to think that I can manage that much and that too in a single night. Always we’ve to remember this, we’ve to make small goals that we can have control over. This is how we can slowly achieve them, and we should always realize how much we can manage so that the goals won’t look overwhelming. Making unrealistic goals and failing to achieve them doesn't mean that we’re useless, it means we’re dumb AF for thinking that we can achieve them. Another important thing that I’ve learned is that if we know that we’re useless or don’t know anything, there are two things we can do about it.

One, we can get angry that why we can’t learn shit and try to learn or two, we can get stressed and decide that we’re like this and nothing can help it and get sad. Most of the people who can manage failures or become successful take the first option and the remaining takes the second and hits the rock bottom. It’s we that have to decide why we’re like this and what to do in order to be better, crying isn’t gonna help. Remember, how much we are willing to suffer determines how much we want to succeed, as simple as that.

But after reading all this we realize one major thing, we all know this stuff already. Yes, we know what to do and why we suck but like Bojack, we just choose to ignore and want to just complain about how everything is so hard and people are shit blah, blah, blah… It all comes down to us, WE are the ones that gonna live our damn life so we should decide how it should be and the only way to do that is by sitting down and start working our asses off. Don’t compare with others as we only know one side of the story, we only know about how much we can see, but then who is that we know in and out? well, it’s easy, it's you. Yes, we know every damn thing about ourselves so just compare ourselves with whom we were yesterday and try to be better slowly every single day.

At the end of the day, it’s always about us, it’s always been about us.

Later.